“It has broken me to my core. The fact that so many people are complicit in starting a perfectly healthy child on a lifetime of medication and surgery.”
Worst decision ever made, by Anonymous Parent
Story told by an anonymous parent. Permission to transcribe this story has been given by Genspect and Genspect Unheard. You can find an audio recording of this parent’s story, and many others like at at Genspect Unheard.
When our child questioned their sexuality in their early teens, we explained that it was part of growing up and they would come to their own conclusions. We were so proud that they were able to share their feelings with us.
Our child had a relationship with a friend, and the mother’s reaction was to banish them, and to tell other parents that her child would not go to parties if ours did. Our child quickly went from having hordes of friends around and loads of parties to none, literally within a couple of weeks. And then soon after, they identified as trans.
We agreed to a child and adolescent mental health appointment. It was the worst decision we ever made, as they immediately led our 14-year-old to believe that their life would be improved with medical transition. On top of this, we found out the school had been calling our child by a different name and pronouns. We arranged meetings with the school, and the school safeguarding officer said, “We have to give them options.”
Options don’t start off with the suggestion of drastic interventions. We went from having a child who we argued with once a year, to having one with utter meltdowns, including with knives and pills.
We don’t blame our child. We blame the doctors and psychologists who didn’t give appropriate care to a vulnerable child. We also blame the schools and mental health professionals who went along with it.
If my child had been anorexic or was taking illegal drugs, the treatment they and we would have received would have been so much different. We would have been supported.
There is a huge failure in the system, and it permeates throughout. We will never trust the [department of health], schools, safeguarding, and many people we used to call friends.
It has broken me to my core. The fact that so many people are complicit in starting a perfectly healthy child on a lifetime of medication and surgery.
